Movie Magic

Tincan decided to post about Underworld over on his website and he was sallivating over Ms. Beckinsale. As I read it I wondered to myself "what movies impacted on me whilst growing up and even current day?" And I had to admit, thanks to loads of movies, I have many hangups...

a) Never bother to wonder what is that noise downstairs in the basement (thank you Texas Chainsaw Massacre).

b) Never think a scarecrow looks cool as it stands in the middle of a field (thank you Jeepers Creepers).

c) Never be tempted to go out camping in the Scottish Highlands (thank you Dog Soldiers).

d) Never pick a fight with the quiet Chinese guy in the corner (any Jet Li movie).

e) Always root for the opposition in Vampire movies (Underworld, Blade and Van Helsing).

f) Never eat cherries, ever again (thank you Witches of Eastwick)

g) Never stand infront of a mirror and say "Candyman" three times (Candyman).

h) Vin Diesel always wins the day (any Vin movie).

i) Milla Jovovich is indestructable and can beat up monsters five times bigger than her (Resident Evil 1 & 2) she is also the Fifth Element.

j) You can ride a shark to surface - after cutting yourself with a knife so that when he attacks you, you can punch it in the nose, grab its fin and have a free ride to to the surface(Tomb Raider 2)

k) Being on the Dark Side is cooler (Star Wars)

l) Being an idiot pilot savant will get you killed (Serenity)

m) Being a cop nets you good pay and a very cool apartment/boat/car (Witchblade/Miami Vice/Bad Boys)

n) All aliens are only ever interested in America and bad things only ever happen there(Independence Day/War of the Worlds/Twister/Core)

o. Cars always explode after they crash (any action movie)

p. Cops are rotten shots, which is why there are so many criminals as no one ever shoots one another dead/wounds anyone (any cop/cowboy movie)

q. Johnny Depp should be renamed Dorian Grey as he looks as spruce as he did back in Nightmare in Elm Street.

r. Never trust a hot chick if she shows interest in you (thank you Xmen and Species - from FG)

s. If you are ever on a spaceshuttle, never stop to investigate a distress signal from another "abandoned" space shuttle - blast it out of the sky and make sure you get far far away(thank you Alien and sequels).

t. If you are a cop, never take a new assignment when you know you are going to retire in a week (Lethal Weapon).

u. Always be a gobbypants baddie so that someone can overhear you and foil your plans (James Bond, Spy Kids, Johnny English etc.)

The list seems endless. Do feel free to add more.