Fan Girl Squeeing

Mark and I pootled around town today, whiling away the day, in order to get to meet the lovely Holly Black and Tony DiTerlizzi, authors of the books the Spiderwick Chronicles which have been made into a movie called, strangely enough, The Spiderwick Chronicles.



I also know Holly from her YA novels she had written:

• Tithe


• Valiant


• Ironside

They are very well written, fun, dangerous and seemingly about real teens.

But, I digress. We headed off to Waterstones' 6th Floor and sat down and waited. I spotted some scrummy posters and asked the lovely W'stones staff member if I could have one after the fact and he said, certainly, you may. Very sweet.

We sat down and waited and slowly but surely the rest of the audience arrived - adults and kids. We did not feel out at all. Which was a big relief.

Tony and Holly came on, did a hilarious presentation about Spiderwick the movie, chatted about how their ideas became reality in the movie and how much fun they had. Oh, and we heard a lot about Beastmaster. Don't ask. You had to be there.

Anyway, about an hour later, having them entertain us with quips and stories and impromptu drawing, they sat down to sign books.

We had decided to buy Holly a present to remember the UK by - a small silver charm from Fossil, in the shape of a crown - she is the queen of YA, after all. She was totally thrilled by it - phew! - and I got my books signed, my poster too and I managed to be a COHERENT fan girl. Which is totally novel for me.

Then we pootled back home. Loot in hand!

Here are some of my pictures I took of my lovely signed items...we were so enraptured by being in their presence, we forgot we had our small digital camera with us. Sorry, Gareth - no photos! Said camera is now dead...so more photos of the other loot, later!

Because I are clever ...

Yay! Got my marks back for my final Planning assignment and lo and behold – I managed to land myself a distinction. How good is that? Can you say SMUG?

Naming your characters

This is from a website of a YA author called Cassandra Clare who wrote a book called City of Bones which I've read - this is so honest about naming characters:



How do you name your characters?


See, that's where your friends can be helpful.





In fact, the other day I was looking for help naming an evil character.


"I need help naming an evil character," I said.


Writer 1: Hot evil or hideous evil?


Me: Hot evil.


Writer 2: Montague.


Me: Montague? Is anyone actually named that?


Writer 2: It's an evil name.


Writer 3: Exactly. You might as well name him Evil McDarkington.


Writer 2 (in an unfriendly tone): So what do you suggest?


Writer 4: Ed.Me: My uncle's name is that.


Writer 5: See, that's the problem with naming characters. You'll always know someone with that name and it'll skew your view.


Writer 2: That's why Montague is a good choice.


Me: I'm not naming him Montague.


Writer 5: Okay, I've got this great evil name. I've been saving it up. It's awesome. I'm going to give it to you. It's a gift. My gift to you.


Me: Great. What is it?


Writer 5: Magnus von Magnus.


Me: What?Writer


5: MAGNUS VON MAGNUS.


Me:: . . .Thanks.





Meanwhile my friend is trying to name some characters in her vampire pirate saga, so she asked me for help.





Me: The problem there is that most vampires have names like Sebastian de Montclaire-Fotherington and most pirates have names like Bloody Beard, so the two don’t really go together.


Writer 1: How about Plaid Beard?


Her: Plaid Beard?


Writer 2: He’s the fashion-forward pirate.


Her: This character is not just a pirate, he’s a vampirate. And he’s Spanish.


Me: How about Enrique?


Her: Enrique what?


Me: Enrique Iglesias.


Her: Great! *writes it down*


Writer 1 (aside): Are you going to tell her?


Me: Eventually.





So it’s not like I’m a lot of help either. Clearly if you need assistance naming characters you should ask someone else.

Shiny!

I'm not really a girl for some serious bling, but I've been lucky enough to get a few treasures this weekend.

Absolutely stunning tarot charm bracelet from a lovely lady called Lorraine. It jingles and jangles very well. I've had people stop and ask me about it today in the shops - amazing!

At Christmas I got this Links bracelet and little doggy bone from my team as a Christmas present, which is just lovely. Subsequently I got given the scottie dog charm for my birthday, the scarab was bought at the Louvre to commemorate my birthday as well as my love all things Egyptian and at Valentines, I received the bookwurm charm. The lucky dice were given to me last year, as I'm lucky in gambling (she says, desperately checking her lottery ticket) and were on my lovely Victorian charm bracelet until I got the modern Links bracelet. And today FG splashed out and bought me the lovely Fossil watch charm.

My Swatch has died, yet again. Sigh. So this now the replacement - and I get to wear them every day, which I think is very cool.

Very shiny.

About Town

We took some pics this weekend on a photo expedition around Old London Town. We didn't manage to get to as many places as we'd like, but barring the Mayas predictions of the end of the world not being in 2012, but sooner...we figured, it's not going anywhere and we can always take another weekend for some more shots.

Walking around Portobello Market with thousands of other people, mingling with the crowd and becoming totally anonymous. Quite a strange feeling.

Small church, just off Denmark Street (Tin Pan Ally) which just called out for some attention. Hope it approves.

The iconic and confusing street sign indicating different places not to go in the West End.

Again with the iconic photos - this one is taken from the steps of the National Gallery which we galloped around briefly before going home. Sad to report that here we could not take any photos in the gallery...due to copyright...so then why could we do it in the Louvre? Not entirely sure I understand it...

Me, thinking: Holy crap, why are all these tourists here? My feet hurt. I want to go home.

Dante's Coffee Emporium

I've not done this on here before...but I quite like my little ditty I wrote for my online writing group over at Livejournal's Musemuggers. Admittedly, it's put together quickly, so (Wordweaver) there is grammar mistakes and such...but it's fun.

Enjoy.

Oh yeah, don't even think about ripping this off and posting it somewhere else.

Dante's Coffee Emporium

I loved the name and the shop the moment I walked in through the heavy glass doors fitted with snarling carved demon heads as doorknobs. The place was old. And cavernous. Bigger than any other coffee shop I’ve ever been in. The floor was taken up by low tables and comfortable looking chairs and meltingly soft chocolate coloured leather sofas. In fact, to be honest, the smell of coffee and the angry muttering of the ancient coffee-brewing contraption behind the counter was the only indicator that this was in fact a coffee shop.

The walls were lined with bookshelves. The shelves themselves held curios from across the world, set happenstance beside leather-bound journals from the dusty past. The walls were decorated with interesting odds and ends. I felt like I had walked into an eccentric anthropologists' home instead of a coffee shop. A didgeridoo, a set of flutes and a lyre sat beside a few masks from Africa and Bali on the wall. I spotted something that suspiciously gleamed like real gold in a glass case. I squinted. Yep, it was definitely some kind of museum quality pectoral decoration from the Sudan. I recognised the style because I had spent a week in the British Museum studying every single piece of jewellery from Egypt, Sudan and every other country of North Africa it held on an essay I wrote about jewellery and personal decoration in ancient times. It was a hobby. I loved jewellery and the older it was the better. My courier bag bulged with photos, photocopies and illustrations of pieces that tickled my fancy.

"Please feel free to sit anywhere. We are quite quiet today." The voice came from the pretty young girl behind the counter. She had vividly pink hair and wide blue eyes. She was, in a word, stunning.

I walked towards the counter and smiled like an eejit.

"Hi, I'm Jack. Actually it's, Jacqueline Crowe. I'm here for the job." I jerk a finger at the window where a sign declared "Part Time Waiter Wanted."

"Oh?" She seemed startled and peered past my shoulder. The sign sat there, glaring out at the world. "Okay then. Well, wait here a sec and I'll go see if Mr. Milton is available to see you."

I smiled my thanks and continued my observation of the coffee shop. There was one other person in the shop. It took me a while to register her presence. She sat in the shadows, her heavy boots resting on the battered coffee table. A Tiffany lamp was behind her, throwing a dark shadow where she sat. She had several books scattered around her, on the table and on the comfortable looking leather couch she was lounging on. Her heavy silver bangles jingled as she brought a cup of coffee to her lips and drank. They jangled when she put the cup down again. She noticed me staring at her and purposefully turned her head to look at me so that the light fell on her face. I quickly looked away, but not before I saw one dark eyebrow arching at me in query. I flushed to the roots of my hair. Not good being caught staring, but there was something about her…

"You're in luck. Mr. Milton's about to leave for the day and is quite happy to give you a few moments of his time." The girl smiled at me. I felt decidedly monochrome in my jeans and Ramones t-shirt. I stared at her vari-coloured outfit for a second and wondered if she was purposefully advertising the Dulux colours that Don't Go Together palette.

I followed her around the counter to a door marked "Private". She knocked politely and gestured me in. As I walked past her I heard her murmur for my benefit: "Good luck."

I was still flashing a grateful smile at her when the door closed firmly behind me with a dull thwack. I was in a large office. Maybe half again the size of the coffee shop. Where there was still some kind of order to the shop outside, there seemed to be none in here. The bookshelves were stacked any which way the books would fit. Two arm chairs faced the main desk and I gingerly made my way there, between crates and piles of books and papers. The carpet was a plush knotted thing with an intricate pattern that reminded me of some kind of Mandala. There is no sign of Mr. Milton. I took a seat nonetheless and checked my watch, very aware of not having an appointment.

A banging noise echoed in the room and a section of the wall behind the main desk swung open. I almost died of fright and froze in the chair. A man, I assume it is Mr. Milton, appeared carrying a crate which he dumped on his desk. A plume of dust rose in the air. He looked down at his shirt and jacket where the crate left streaks of dust and shook his head in annoyance.

"Must remember to stop at the laundry and pick up some clothes." He muttered this to himself, before he becomes aware of me. His face creased into a friendly smile. I liked him. He had an open face, friendly and quietly handsome. I took him to be in his late forties. "Oh right. Here you are. Very nice to meet you, Jacqueline. I am John Milton. And no, not that John Milton." He shook my hand. It was a good firm grip. My granddad would approve of it. None of this limp wristed jelly handed greetings either.

"Please, call me Jack."

"Jack, eh? It’s been a while since we’ve had one. Good name. A lot of history." He sat down behind the table and gestured to a pack of cigarettes. ""Would you like one?" I shook my head in the negative and he lit up. They are herbal cigarettes, and don't smell too bad. "So, have you got any coffee shop or waitressing experience, at all?"

"A summer, working down in Cornwall at one of the bars there. In my gap year." I hauled out my CV and handed it to him. Probably not the thing he wanted to look at, but hey, you never know.

He dutifully took it and squints at it through the cigarette smoke.

"Oh, interesting. I see you've done some voluntary archaeological digs in Egypt. Interesting. Very interesting." He took a few moments to read it through. I waited patiently. I am good at it.

Mr. Milton narrowed very green eyes at me. "So, why do you want to work at Dante's?"

"Oh." I breathe out heavily. "Because it's one of the coolest shops I've ever been in. And I like coffee." I pause. “Also, I need something to do over summer and working here part time will help me pay for my research.”

"Good answer." He handed me the CV back and I slide it into my courier back. "I must warn you though, this place heaves over the weekends and at night. It literally becomes the coffee shop from hell. We get artists and performers here from all the theatres around here. And you know arty types – very hard work.”

“I will be able to cope – local artists can hardly be any more demanding than grumpy scholarly types on digs out in a desert or laid back surfers high on sex wax, sun and sea.”

He barked out a laugh and came around the table to help me out of the chair.

“When can you start?”

“As soon as you need me to.”

“Excellent. Speak to Summer out front. She will sit down and work a schedule out with you. Oh, and remember – wear comfy shoes.”

As easy as that. I found Summer chatting quietly to the woman with all the books spread out around her. She looked up at my approach.

“And?”

“I got the job!”

If I expected her to look pleased on my behalf I was disappointed. She gave me a long slow look.

“Pity. This place is hell.”

“I’m sure I’ll be fine.”

“Hmm. We’ll see.”

As we turned back to the counter I got a good look at the woman lounging on the couch. She was tall and slender, dressed in comfortable jeans and a sleeveless top. I turned to speak to Summer about schedules, but not before I notice the spiked tail curling around the coffee cup on the table and lifting it to her hand, so she didn’t have to stretch.

Ah. Suddenly I got it. This was indeed the coffee shop from hell.

A book staircase!?

OMG. I want one of these.

This is the article about the book staircase - incredibly clever...and I love it.

A music blog

I am really excited about the new music coming to the market in 2008.

I've not really paid that much attention to music the past few months, being completely wrapped up in my coursework. Music was there to see me through my journey to and from work. On weekends it was invariably just listening to the radio.

But, having gone back to gym more regularly, I've been paying more attention to my music on my mp3 player and realised that I've got a lot of "old" music on there. Not that there is anything wrong with that, per se...but it is good to find new artists that enthuse you. And I have.

I've discovered Adele, her amazing album 19 - which I got just yesterday. Really good - but very much Eliza Wren Payne. Her style reminds me of Eliza's - very similar quirky songs, the style she sings in and her voice...but she is very much her own person. I have no idea the hype about her, but clearly its been played out very well. And it is worthy of the hype, in my opinion.

Another lady whom I can't wait to see live or own the cd of is Duffy. Not only is she gorgeous, killer dimples, and very talented, her music is amazing. She has a rich soulful voice and it reminds me a bit of music from divas in the sixties and seventies. Her album is out very soon so I will place a pre-order for that to come through. They have the official video for her song Mercy on amazon.co.uk and youtube.com.

There is another young lady out called:Colbie Caillat who is another singer/songwriter - yet another good voice hitting the market. This is the video on youtube of her song "Bubble". How incredibly natural and effortless does she make this look? (insert jealous face) I hope she makes it HUGE.

Then I recently bought the Plain White T's album and have been listening to that a lot. Also Newton Faulkner who is very fun and funky...and I think his image - dreadlocked and a bit scruffy - belies completely how hard he's worked to get his music out there. And indeed, his talent seems effortless.

Then - for me - someone who I think I will like even more than I do already - David Jordan. His song: The Sun goes down, is just ... mad. It makes you want to dance and ponce around. The album is incredible. Place in my heart is my next favourite track from the album.

I also heard some good things about a band called Ben's Brother and bought the album. Their music is good, solid. Their album very nice to listen to...but I'm not 100% about it though - FG loves it and listens to it all the time. He lead singer has a bit of Rod Stewart to his voice...which sort of puts me off a bit. But there you go.

We also got Biffy Clyro who are outstanding, as well as The Editors who has been around for a while and I kept hearing their music and then decided to ask for their cd as a xmas present. Amazing stuff. Very talented artists and here's hoping they'll be around a long good while still.

A few weeks ago, in the sales, I bought Amy MacDonald's debut album and I have to say - I really have high hopes for her. Her voice is that little hoarse, totally sexy and her lyrics are fun, or so you think, humming along. Then you listen to them, or you read the inset and realise that it's not all sunshine and roses. They are written by a very clever young lady who has a keen eye.

And of course - there is beautiful Jack Savoretti who I have yet to see perform live, but by all counts, he is really good. He is currently playing in various Caffe Nero venues - so watch out - he might come to one near you!

We've booked tickets to go see his gorgeousness - Seth Lakeman - in August at Regents Park and I cannot wait. We'll be seven rows from front. Squeeing. Including FG. Of course, this will be me coming away desperatingly wanting to finger my guitar until my little dog runs a mile.

Student Daze

It was up at five this morning to get ready in time to get to Paddington to catch a train to Reading for my second Face To Face tutoring session for the DipSurv diploma at CEM. Thankfully this time around I knew a group of girls, so we met up before the time and travelled together. It sort of makes things easier if you hang in a "posse".

We had the introduction to our Legal Studies and Building Technology modules today - incredibly interesting. No, seriously. I can't wait to get stuck into it. I even get to use Latin in the Legal bits and we were encouraged to think plainly and logically about things in the Building Technology module. Did you know there are about ten different parts to the stairs in your house? Yup. Watch this space - will no doubt feel the urge to inflict my line drawings on the world at large.

I feel a lot more confident about this part of the module than I did about either the Technical Communication or the Land Use Planning sections - which is odd. I have absolutely no idea what either of these other two modules will contain but I think that the first part of the course really taught me to think logically, how to plot an assignment in a reasonable and relatively sensible way. Which probably goes a long way to helping in the confidence aspect of it all.

I am however concerned about work. I have not been doing anything relating to my course. I have, in fact, been doing exactly what I have been doing these past few years, with no more being given to me. Part of it is because of the graduates that has been forced onto us - they are basically doing what should in theory be coming my way. Bosses have acknowledged that I should be given more work to do, more reports and such - as opposed to just admin things. And I hope it does come my way. I am loathe to sit there and waste my time.

Right, it's 11pm and I've now been up exactly eighteen hours. I think I deserve some sleep.

Dream a little dream for me...

Lucid Dreaming.

The term conjures images of dreaming in Cinemascope. Technicolour. Amazingly vivid and real, photoreal. Touch and feel real. And it is rare that I remember having these dreams. Or any dreams for that matter.

Now and again I have a few disturbing dreams about work, but it usually results in me bashing Mark in my sleep so that he walks around with a sore face for a few days and can’t figure out why. Sorry, hun.

Last night’s dream though has me stumped. I dreamed that I was en route to our local shopping centre. At the head of a giant army. And not just any old army. Futuristic armies straight out of the Warhammer world, complete with Space Marines, Inquisitors and Sisters of Battle. Including the guns, the weapons, the vehicles, the chatter in my head. All of it. Like some bizarre Saving Private Ryan, only grittier and noisier and me in charge.

Now this would be an understandable dream had I anything to do with Warhammer. I don’t. Admittedly FG has the new Dark Heresy RPG book which he’s been reading through. I’ve not even opened the front covers to look at it. He plays some of it on his computer and PSP and I’ve not played or seen either.

This however did not stop me from taking over the Glades Shopping Centre in Bromley as my army base and shooting the crap out of insurgent aliens in the form of orkz, tyranids and whatever else my fevered imagination could come up with.

I woke up this morning, utterly exhausted. Directing an army is incredibly tiring work. Who knew? Needless to say Bromley town centre does not exist anymore. I’ve shot it to shit and levelled it with so many bombs even bugs would not survive it.

Can anyone please explain to me…why Warhammer and why Bromley? Maybe Croydon, or Birmingham is worthy of levelling, but Bromley?? And why was I this seriously important Space Marine Commander who had the entire army under my command? I know I like being a bossy cow, but this is taking it a bit far.

But I had a really cool gun. A big one. Samaritan sized which would have made Hellboy sob into his cat litter.

Lucid dreaming. Seriously disturbing shyte.

Ancient City Travellers

We're back. We're exhausted. We're really smug. We've lost a mobile phone. We've got some awesome pictures. We've lost weight because of all the walking. We're planning to go back and do the rest of the Louvre and the remaining parts of the City we've not seen.

Here are some of our photos.

Freak Of Nature Club

I attended a babyshower yesterday for our friend Almay. It was a bit of a surprise shower, as she did not suspect a single thing. It was a proud thing when we walked in and everyone called out "Surprise!" - I was terrified though that she would go into labour immediately. I had to sneak her off to the shops so that her hubby could sort out the house and her other friends could arrive and set up for the cake and tea we had arranged. It was a success - she got lovely presents from everyone.

It was however a deeply disturbing time for me. I had nothing, besides the fact that I happened to be female, in common with these other women who were there. I sat there, and I could feel my eyebrows climb and climb higher and higher into my hairline. They occupy a completely and utterly different world to me. To anyone, really. It was surreal, to say the least. I found myself listening to them talking about nursing, breast feeding, attending ante natal classes. And in the end, it totally just became white noise. I did turn to Almay at one stage and said: "All I can hear is blah blah blah", and they all laughed. I was the only one there not pregnant, not hormonal or already had some kids - NOT counting Sparrow of course. I ate a few scones, took some ibuprufen to stave off an onrushing headache and listened to "The wheels on the bus go round and round, round and round". And naturally, the age old question came up: "So, Liz, are you going to have kids?" I am so tired of the question and again demured, without losing my patience, too much, not wanting to point out that the question was boring, old hat...and I can go on, but then I will just sound even more angry and bitter than I really feel. So I got bitchy.

I did point out that we are planning a few holidays over to Paris, Rome and defintely a trip to Peru to hike the Inca Trail. Also mentioned the new movies coming out which would be fantastic to go and watch. And a few daytrips we are planning to take over to Whitstable and down to the countryside to the Chilli Festival. All of which we can do without much trouble or hassle, as we don't have kids or pregnant bellies in tow. Silence fell and I could feel the annoyance and resentment. And I felt better. The one woman did turn and say, sotto voice: "Oh, I suppose if the hormones have not kicked in by now, they probably never will."

And I had to bite the inside of my cheeks not to burst out laughing as she sounded so resentful and bitter.

So, join the Freak of Nature Club (or the Footloose and Fancy Free Club). I'm the founding member.

Birthday!

Going to the City of Love and Lights for my birthday in Feb!

Preens!

Varekai!

We went to go see the new Cirque du Soleil show this Saturday past. FG and I had NO idea what to expect - we knew we were going to be blown away, but we had no idea exactly how much.

The show is entitled Verakai which is Rom for "Wherever" - this production pays tribute to the nomadic soul, to the spirit and art of the circus tradition, and to the infinite passion of those whose quest takes them along the path that leads to Varekai. (This from the CDS website).

Wordweaver and friends stated that this show is not as good as previous years. Personally I am stunned by that - to me the show was absolutely mindblowing. Words cannot begin to describe how utterly astounding, acrobatic and creative these people are. It makes you believe that anything can indeed happen, if only you believed hard enough.

We had a brilliant time and at times forgot to breathe - hazardous, I know, but ye gods, some of those boys flying through the air almost caused a lot of people in the audience to die from shock and worry. They are mindblowingly amazing. I would recommend the show highly. In fact, I at first thought that the music being played as the actors and acrobats performed was a cd being run over loudspeakers but it turns out that the music was all performed live by the most talented group of musicians. They came to do a final bow and I jumped up and clapped furiously. They were astounding. The show is hard to describe - it is visually arresting and has to be experienced. No one can begin to explain it...purely because it will sound as if you are on crack or something.

Afterwards we disappeared off to Wimbledon for some lovely food with Wordweaver, partner Ann and the scrummy Ilse and Steph and newly made friends, Dorothy and Betty (who are an absolute pleasure to chat to - very ladylike, very wickedly funny and just so full of life. I instantly lost my heart to them both - anyone who can make saucy comments about lemon cheesecake is a good 'un in my book!) I would also recommend Piccolino's in Wimbledon for some good nosh - genuinely good food, good prices (nudge to Ilse and Steph), and good service. I had the lasagne and I do declare it one of the best ones I've ever had.

We trammed it back from Wimbledon to Beckenham and met two lovely - if drunk - chaps on the tram who entertained us with mad comments about who they think the announcer on the tram was. Some famous tv personality - we only grinned and laughed at their insanity. They were actually quite sweet - if inebriated - and it just went to show that you can have fun being a little drunk without turning into a complete and utter yob.

Anyway - back on the wagon this week - rejoined Weightwatchers last week. Hurrah! Have got aim in my life again, am back in the competition and am ready to lose the next 3 stone. Please post comments of support and admiration. It will be much appreciated!

Demon or spirit?

I'm sitting at home today, impatiently waiting for a plumber to arrive to fix our boiler that's gone on the blink. So, with time on my hand (read "do anything but the next land use assignment") I surfed the net and visited an all-time favourite: the National Geographic website - where I found this article that sort of makes you wonder even more about what human-kind's beliefs are based on:

Judas was a traitor—even a "demon"—according to a new translation of the recently revealed Gospel of Judas. The new interpretation contradicts the first translation, released by the National Geographic Society in April 2006. But the debate is far from settled.That initial interpretation of the newfound gospel says that the apostle was following Jesus' orders when he gave Jesus up to enemy soldiers.

In the National Geographic translation, the text's ancient authors depict Judas Iscariot as Jesus' closest friend and the only apostle who truly understood Christ's message. (The National Geographic Society owns National Geographic News.)The Bible famously tells of Judas Iscariot betraying Jesus for 30 pieces of silver.

Evil as Ever?

April DeConick, a professor of biblical studies at Rice University in Texas, says the first translators got it wrong.

In her new book, The Thirteenth Apostle: What the Gospel of Judas Really Says, DeConick offers her own translation of the gospel."In my translation Judas did not come across as a benevolent spirit like he does in National Geographic's translation," DeConick said. "He emerged as a much more negative Judas—a demon Judas as evil as ever."

Marvin Meyer is one of the translators who National Geographic enlisted. He said he welcomes additional interpretations of the Gospel of Judas."It doesn't come as any surprise whatsoever to find out that there would be another kind of interpretation," said Meyer, a biblical scholar at Chapman University in California. "What is remarkable is the extent to which what was presented early on still has carried the day with us and most people."

Heretical Origins

The Gospel of Judas was found in a codex, or ancient book, that dates back to the third or fourth century A.D.(Related news: "Medieval Christian Book Discovered in Ireland Bog" [July 26, 2006].)

Written in Coptic, or Egyptian Christian, script, the text is believed to be a translation of the original—a Greek text written sometime before A.D. 180.

The document remained hidden for more than 1,700 years before it was discovered in Egypt in the 1970s. About 85 percent of the fragile text has been restored, but major gaps remain.

(See photos of the pages on the Lost Gospel of Judas Web site.)

The author of the text is unknown. But scholars say it originated with a group of early Christians known as Sethian Gnostics.

These "heretics" believed that truth could be known only through revelation from Jesus and a personal experience with God—hence the Gospel of Judas's subtitle: "the secret account of the revelation that Jesus spoke in conversation with Judas Iscariot."

"Demon" vs. "Spirit"

DeConick said she was excited to see the Gospel of Judas translated, and began analyzing the text immediately after it was published last year."But I soon noticed that my translation wasn't matching [National Geographic's] in significant spots," she said. At the center of the debate is one passage in which Jesus calls Judas "daimon."

According to the National Geographic translation, "daimon" means "spirit."DeConick, however, maintains that "daimon" should be translated to mean "demon," and that Jesus literally calls Judas a demon."What we find in all the Gnostic materials—and I've found about 50 references to the word 'daimon' in these texts—[is that] they're always indicating demons, malicious figures that possess and torment people, trying to get people to do things they're not supposed to do against God," she said.

But Meyer, who worked on National Geographic's translation, said Sethian Gnostics were also heavily influenced by earlier, Greek writings. In those texts "daimon" is used to mean "spirit" or to describe the spiritual side of a person.

The Gospel of Judas was written at an early stage and in an almost entirely Greek-influenced form, he said. For that reason "daimon" should read "spirit," he added."It is only in the developing Judeo-Christian heritage that eventually 'daimon' becomes exclusively negative," Meyer said.

New Testament scholar Simon Gathercole—who was not involved in the National Geographic translation project—said that either "demon" or "spirit" could be correct. "

'Demon' is the meaning in the New Testament, though it only appears a few times. And 'spirit' is the meaning in Plato. And the Gospel of Judas is influenced by both the New Testament and Plato," said Gathercole, of the University of Cambridge in England.

Antti Marjanen, a biblical scholar at the University of Helsinki in Finland, warned against reading too much into the use of that one word."Since the word 'daimon' appears only once in the entire text, some caution should be exercised in its interpretation," said Marjanen, who also was not part of the National Geographic Society effort."Even if it is taken as a negative reference, it does not necessarily mean that it is the final characterization of Judas in the text."

At Odds

Many of the Sethian beliefs were at odds with those of what would become mainstream Christianity. The Sethians did not, for example, believe that God would have sacrificed his child, Jesus, to atone for humanity's sins.The Gnostic texts contradicted the Gospels of Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John found in the New Testament. As a result, the Gnostic gospels were later denounced by Christian leaders and refused inclusion in the Bible. No scholar of early Christianity seems to believe that the Gospel of Judas provides a historically reliable account of the relationship between Jesus and Judas. Instead, it is seen as the Gnostic interpretation of that relationship."

Jesus' voice [in the Gospel of Judas] is the Gnostic voice challenging the apostolic Christians to reassess their faith, to listen to their own reason and consciences rather than blindly accept their faith because they thought it was handed down to them from the twelve disciples," DeConick said.(Follow a time line of early Christianity.)

Special Kingdom

In another passage in the National Geographic version, Judas tells Jesus, "You have set me apart for that generation"—apparently meaning the enlightened Gnostics who, in DeConick's words, "populate the upper world."But DeConick says a Coptic phrase used in the passage—"porj e"—actually means "to separate from" and not "to set apart for.""Judas has not been set apart to belong to the holy generation, as the National Geographic translation suggests," she writes in her book."My corrected translation reads completely the opposite," she told National Geographic News."Judas is upset because he has received esoteric teaching from Jesus—teaching which he sees as useless, because he has been separated from the Gnostic generation who populate the upper world."

In National Geographic's The Gospel of Judas, Critical Edition, both "set apart for" and "separated from" are offered as possible translations.

Even if the correct interpretation is that Judas has been separated from that generation, the meaning is still not clear, some scholars suggest."I actually agree with the interpretation of the Coptic verbal expression 'to set apart from' and not 'for.' But I am not sure that the generation the text talks about is the holy generation," said Marjanen, the Finnish scholar."Rather, I read [that] Judas is set apart from the generation of the earthly kingdom the other disciples belong to."

Meyer, one of the National Geographic-supported translators, said the issues of translation DeConick highlights are almost all discussed in the footnotes of National Geographic's popular edition and critical edition of the Gospel of Judas."We're really only quibbling about the interpretation of a few passages," he said. "April looks at two to three passages … and with a revisionist understanding of those few passages, she sees the text in an entirely different light."

Satire?

DeConick said she believes the gospel should be seen as a parody."It's certainly satire. [In the Gospel of Judas] Jesus is always mocking the disciples, who are characterized as faithless and ignorant," she said."The author uses humor in a very subversive way in order to criticize and correct apostolic Christianity."

But Gathercole, the Cambridge scholar, does not believe the gospel was written as a parody."It's a standard Gnostic-style gospel," Gathercole said."And since it was common for Gnostics to turn biblical images and figures upside down, there's a logic to their use of Judas," he said.

Meyer said there is a fundamental problem with the Judas-as-demon argument: If Judas was a demon, why did Jesus confide in him?"To make this negative assessment work, you have to wink at, or put an asterisk next to, all the positive things said about Judas in the text," he said."But this is the gospel—the 'good news'—of Judas," Meyer said. "The main reason why the text was composed was so that people would be able to learn something about Sethian thought as it is being communicated to Judas."

To say that it was all a joke, it was all a parody … well, we don't have any other text from antiquity or late antiquity that functions like that," he said.

Piecing it Together

DeConick also criticizes National Geographic for mishandling the translation project by not making full-size, high-resolution copies of the manuscript available to outside scholars for analysis. (Such copies will, however, be available for download by mid-January 2008 on National Geographic's Gospel of Judas Web site.)"

National Geographic didn't follow the best procedure for dealing with new academic finds," she said."Having a text only being worked though by a certain set of scholars ends up resulting in a situation where the material can't be double-checked and can't be questioned before its release.New Testament scholar Craig Evans worked on the National Geographic team. He disagrees with some of the translation choices and interpretations made by his colleagues on the National Geographic Society [NGS] project.

Even so, Evans defends National Geographic's handling of the project."When the National Geographic Society gained access to the Tchacos Codex [the larger book that contains the gospel] … it would have been pointless to publish photographic plates, because the codex was in pieces," said Evans, of Acadia Divinity College in Nova Scotia, Canada. "It took years to put the thing together so that the text could actually be viewed and read," he said. "Once that part of the work was finished, NGS had the text available for the public in a very expeditious manner."(Related news: "Gospel of Judas Pages Endured Long, Strange Journey" [April 6, 2006].)

Meyer, meanwhile, dismissed any suggestion that his team set out with any kind of agenda to rehabilitate the image of Judas in its translation of the gospel. "Our only agenda was to interpret the text, make sense of it, and get it out as quickly as possible," he said."To produce a first translation and the first critical edition is a thankless task, because you know you're putting yourself out on a limb. And chances are pretty good that at least a part of that limb is going to come down as time passes," Meyer added."That's just the way scholarship works."

Sparrowmaticus And Sickly Liz Thoughts...

About 2 weeks ago, Sparrow stepped in a thorn on one of our rambles around the country park. We removed the thorn, he hobbled for a bit but then seemed to be all right. We didnt' give it any thought but then a week and a bit ago, we noticed him limping quite badly. FG examined the little paws and we found this odd kind of growth between his claws. It looked raw and inflamed. We poked and prodded and cleaned it out, thinking that a piece of the thorn had stayed behind. It didn't heal so I took him to vet - what trauma, on the train, two stops down the line and after a cursory exmamination we were given some antibiotics.

We fed him the antiobiotics for seven days, twice a day, but no luck. The little wrinkled raisin-like inflamed thinghie just sat there. So we took again on Friday afternoon and he got booked into the vet for surgery today. In fact, he is probably going through the surgery now, to remove the piece of growth/inflamed sack of stuff.

It is so weird, sitting here, at home, without the hot little breath next to me. I unlocked the door after dropping him with the vet, expecting a fuss to be made of my return, but then I remembered I just left him with a strange man with sharp tools and was racked with guilt. Poor pup.

He will have to wear a doggy shoe to prevent the bandage from getting wet and from him worrying at it. I am to ring at around half two to find out what time I can collect him from the vet. I am a bit worried about the bill too, but am relieved that the insurance does cover it and we will be paid back.

Gosh. I know it's for his own good but you just end up feeling so helpless.

What's made matters worse is that I picked up a stinker of a cold before (literally, that Saturday) Christmas. I was rotten with it on the day, and this whole week past. I've now had it for more than a week already and feel utterly drained and awful. My voice has changed, I have a smokers' racking cough and my face is constantly swollen from sinusses. I'm breathing through an open mouth but that is becoming worse because I have a raw-red and sore throat. There is no party for us tonight, purely because - as FG puts it: "You are still unclean" - and I agree. I fade in and out of conversations. Doing anything takes absolute ages. Making tea takes about ten minutes, then I forget to drink it.

So, it's been crap. Feel sorry for us - poor FG trapped in a house with sickly wife, pawly pup and crappy tv. Knowing him he'll probably celebrate by killing things online. Bring on 2008.

December thoughts

And so Christmas has come and gone in a flurry of good food, visits with friends, cool pressies and very little visits to the shops.

I am genuinely pleased it is over and am looking forward to a skinny frugal year for 2008. I know I've not overdone it, foodwise, these past few weeks, but I've not been to gym as much as I would have liked. This is due to work-commitments, icy cold weather and wotnot - but yes, these are excuses.

I am due to lose a further 2, and at a push, 3 stone this year. I am setting goals and with FG's help, both of us will be slinky. We are very keen. And we are also going to have a helluva lot on our plate next year, with both of us being focussed on work, me on my uni-course, general writing for both of us, going to gym, outdoors excercise and general frugality.

But it is a challenge and we are quite happy to do it. The only things stopping us are ourselves.

I have a nightmare of an assignment to get out for the 3rd of January. I've worked on it today at work for a bit and am convinced I am about 98% there. In fact, I've worked so hard on this thing, that I've gone past caring. I'm going to make sure my "i's" are dotted, it's formatted perfectly and that my appendices are up to scratch. Then I'm going to close my eyes and say "fuckit" and submit it. I've done it three times now. Fourth time lucky, right? Right? Here's hoping for another 75%. In all honesty - on this one - if I pass, I'll be thrilled.

Mist and Frost

Loving the new slr! See the pretty pictures!

Time Lord

Well now - utterly blown away by coincidences.

I have got four watches. All of them Swatch. I've had them for about....seven years now. And they all died. Round about exactly the same time. Bearing in mind that they have been bought separately, over a few years' time.

I would like to think I am very brand loyal...but looking at some of the things Swatch has come up with lately, I am thinking that I will maybe veer towards a Fossil when the time comes for me to buy a new watch (around my b'day time in Feb) . I am not fussed about it at the moment. I've come to realise I don't really look at my watch that much. As long as my mobile is working and my computer / deskphone is on, at work, I'm sorted. I purely used to use it as a weapon. No kidding. Big, bulky, huge - it saved my arm many times as people tend to shove and push, not expecting to connect quite so metallic and hard to be worn on an arm. Grins evilly. Especially as I am that specific height where I am the perfect target for taller people who think they can happily muck you about as they run to and from work on pavements.

I like my big bulky watch and feel pangs of jealousy when I spot someone else with one even bigger than mine. It is almost not possible, but some serious divers' watches do give mine a run for its money.

However, as a research project, I've gone to have a look at the Fossil site and this one, I think shows promise. Also, the mere fact that you can build your own watch is pretty cool.

As I said - I am not fussed about a timepiece at the moment. I'll ring up Swatch to see how much a replacement battery costs for one of my favourites. It's lasted me seven years. I am gorram sure it has another seven or so in it. In the meantime, I can look at all the other shinies.

Remember. FRUGAL year. Frugal.

Christmas Lights

I love my new camera.

Squee.